I’ve got so many big choices to make. I don’t have to make them right now, but it’s still daunting knowing that sooner or later I’ll be faced with them. One choice is whether to have any more children. I know my husband would like to have more, but it’s such a massive commitment, much […]
Today is a day of panic. My stomach is a knot of tension that’s refusing to ease. It’s physically painful.
I’m sorry it’s been a few days since my last post. I’ve been finding it hard to get motivated to write about my feelings and I’m not entirely sure why. Things with my husband are going okay, aside from the trust issues that are crippling me right now. I desperately want to trust him, and […]
Today I’ve felt fairly low. It started this morning when I checked Facebook and discovered that my old high school friendship group had had a party for one of their 21st birthdays, and they didn’t invite me. They’ve had get-togethers in the past without inviting me and that’s hurt my feelings, but this time it […]
I wonder if having someone to blame helps or hinders. I feel like the reason my anxiety and depression is as severe as it is right now is my mother. I blame her. And at times, I hate her. I hate her when I’m so overwhelmed by life that I want to cease existing. I […]
I don’t know where to go from here. I desperately don’t want a radio silence to form between myself and my Mum. I don’t want to abandon hope that my relationship with her can be fixed. But I just can’t talk to her right now. Thinking about her instantly triggers my anxiety, with reactions ranging […]
Life’s just full of crap and I’m fed up with it.
The doctor increased my medication dose today. I’m on sertraline, I was previously on 100mg daily and now that’s up to 150mg. I don’t know how I feel about it. I think I do need more, but I’m just worried that being on more will have some kind of adverse affect on me. I’m not […]
Today is one of those days where my stomach is hurting pretty much constantly from stress. I really don’t like it.
I miss my little girl. She is away with her dad at the moment, and I miss her terribly. She sees him once a month, but I can’t get used to it. I can’t accept it. I think I’m always hoping something will change and it won’t have to happen anymore. It feels unnatural, handing […]