Today I cut myself with a knife because I want someone to care. I told my husband I needed him to be with me today but he went to work anyway. So I cut myself. It’s the first time I’ve done it. I just want him to care. For the record, the cut is pathetic. […]
I can’t breathe I can’t sleep I can’t see I can’t speak I can’t hope I can’t dream I can’t live I can’t be me At least, not the me I used to be
Is there any way back Once you’ve fallen from the cliff And plummeted in confidence To a bitter self-loathing? Can you ever love yourself again If gravity only pulls one way?
Today is a low day. It’s like trudging through treacle, except falling doesn’t taste so sweet. I wish I could just sleep away the day, escape from the suffocating darkness. I wish I could look in the mirror and not be repulsed by what I see. On days like this I wonder what the point […]
In a nutshell.
I can only get away From the blackness The pain Agony When I’m asleep Because for a few moments I’m free And I can give myself a break But lately sleep has become harder More elusive And I find myself thinking: What if one day I can’t escape What if I have to spend the […]
I am a useless mother And a useless wife I am nothing And nobody I hate myself
I feel worthless. I feel ugly. I feel taken for granted. I feel unappreciated. I feel stupid. I feel repulsive. I feel unlovable. I feel disgusting. I feel hated. I feel a burden. I feel a disappointment. I feel unimportant. I feel like I’m drowning and nobody has noticed. Nobody looks hard enough to notice. […]
I spoke to my Dad today on the phone, and for the first time I was honest with him about how things are with me. I mean, I’m honest all the time, but I’m usually more generic with my responses, giving blanket answers rather than specifics. And I often downplay things a little. But today […]