So today’s been okay so far, and since I’m feeling alright I’m determined to write a blog entry that’s positive for the first time in ages.
Life is a struggle, but I am so grateful for moments like these when I’m able to keep the panic at bay. Who knows how long it will last, but I’m going to try and enjoy it while I can.
My Dad is planning to come over for a little while this evening en route back home from a business client. I haven’t seen any of my family in a long time because they live so far away, so it’s nice to grab small moments when we can. I am looking forward to seeing him, but I’m also dreading the effect it will have on me. I know from experience that speaking to my Dad/siblings about the mess my parents’ marriage is in really takes its toll on my anxiety afterwards. And having visitors to my home is tough for me as well, so I’m expecting a double helping of panic at some point later on.
But I suppose I can’t isolate myself forever, and one of the best ways to combat anxiety is to do the things I’d rather avoid. I know I’ll never recover if I keep hiding away and refusing to do things that stress me out.
Of course, it’s easy reeling off the theory like that. It’s another thing entirely to try and put it into action. It’s easier said than done. But isn’t everything?